Give Me Love
by epierce123
Summary: This is the story of Quinn Fabray learning to forgive. This is the story of learning to accept the love she deserves. Even from someone she leasts expects.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

It was the Andie's idea to start the journal, not mine.

Let's just begin with that.

It just happened that the journal would be my sort of savior in the end. See, I thought I'd write just to make my therapist happy. I thought that there'd never be a time when Quinn Fabray (that's me) would be okay. I'd see glimpses of hope here and there. It was those times where I found myself being happy.

Those moments of happiness, however, didn't prepare me for the pain that was bound to come my way.

Truthfully, happiness wasn't something that came easy for me. It had to be fought. I had to fight for moments of pure bliss. I struggled for moments of alrightness.

But it happened. It just wasn't what I wanted. I didn't want happiness to come from someone else. Still, every time she touched me I felt myself unravel. My walls would crumble and I felt naked. She looked at me like I wasn't cruel or broken. She put me on this pedestal and I couldn't help but be fearful for the moment I fell off. I grew scared of the cracks in my pretense because I knew she'd find them.

Her fingers.

I found myself shivering as her fingers trailed lightly down my arm. Her nails would draw patterns on my skin, across my stomach. I imagined it all to be simple; I refused to believe it was purely a matter of the heart. I refused to believe it was love.

Of course it was.

But I won't admit that until it's over. Until I'm wallowing in self pity and I'm drowning in my sorrows.

All I wanted was to be happy. I wanted to be by myself.

Yet.

I'm here. Craving her touch. Feeling the absence of her in my heart.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

It had been a really shitty day. The weather was all around awful; the wind was causing my eyes to tear up and the rain was making my hair frizz. I looked atrocious.

We were sitting in Glee club and even though I was miserable, I was looking at the legs, hips, breasts, and lips of the diva of the group. Miss Rachel Berry.

The question in my mind is not why am I ogling this person so obviously, but rather, why did it take me so damn long to see how beautiful Rachel was. She really is quite a sight to see. I've tuned out most of what she's saying because to be honest, she can be rather annoying.

Rachel Berry. She was the only person I know who had the ambition and determination to get out of Lima, Ohio. In truth, I think that scared me. It scared me to know how much I envied her.

We first met our freshman year of high school. She was wearing her high socks and her hideous yellow cardigan. What turned me off most about Rachel was that she was just so damn confident. She walked around school like she was untouchable, even with red slushy dripping down her face. Like she knew that she was the only one at William McKinley High who was going to get out.

It was her voice. She was good. She was damn good. People who hated her would stop doing everything just to watch her sing. No matter how much people hated her, we would still clap after every performance. It was like she cast her spell on people whenever she sung.

But at some point, that spell would wear off. This one time I found Rachel crying in the girl's bathroom trying to get the red slushy out of her shirt. For a split second, I could feel my heart ache for her but instead of saying something helpful or nice, I'd find myself saying " Wow, Berry… I think your outfit looks better than it did before". Time and time again, I would bring her down. At some point, I realized I probably didn't have a heart anymore. I wouldn't feel anything when I saw her being slushied, I didn't feel sorry or bad anymore. I felt nothing. So when she looked at me that day, with a sense of determination, I found myself scared shitless.

I could never have prepared myself for the whirlwind of miss Rachel Barbra Berry.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

I was standing in front of my locker trying to remember what I needed to bring home.

"What are your plans for the weekend?"

I turn to see if my ears had deceived me, but they hadn't. I find Rachel standing next to me, staring at me expectantly. I could hear her intake of breath, waiting for me to respond.

"Berry, since when are we friends?" I hated how harsh my words sounded. But people were starting to stare and I couldn't have that.

She sighs " I'll answer your question, if you answer mine."

"Fine" I snap, " I have plans with friends". That was a lie. The only thing I had planned was avoiding my parents and hiding from my "friends".

She has a slow smile forming on her face and at this point, I'm thoroughly confused. "Quinn Fabray. We've always been friends. Even though we might not always see eye to eye on things, we have always been friends. You can pretend to dislike me, but somewhere deep down, I know you like me. And, obviously I like you too! If it takes me the rest of the school year to get you to see that our friendship means something, then I accept this challenge. Have fun this weekend, I'll see you around Q." She turns and skips off into the other direction, straight into my exes arms. Finn Hudson.

The thing about Finn is that you really can't hate him. He may be one of the dumbest guy I've ever met, but he a good one. I hate the fact that I don't hate him, not even a little.

The truth is.

I never loved Finn.

I don't even know if I really liked about him.

I just wanted someone to have. You know? I just wanted to feel something for a once.

Needless to say, I never did feel anything.

Still.

I'd always cared about Finn. I liked the fact that he'd always hold my books when he walked me to class or offer me his jacket on a date. Finn was a nice guy. I'm just not a nice girl.


	4. Chapter 4

Hey Readers, I'm hoping you are enjoying the story so far. I'm sorry it's so angsty, I promise that it'll get better. (This is my first fanfic after all). Anyways, with that said... It might take me a few days to upload the next chapter. My next day off for work is Tuesday. bleh.

Welp, thanks for sticking with me. :)

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><p><strong>Chapter 4<strong>

_The streetlights are the only light I see in my life. Walking at night gets my thoughts to settle. Sometimes I think that thinking makes me insane. The constant reminders of all the things I've failed at always play on repeat in my mind when I'm around my parents. I can see the disappointment on their faces. I've stopped in the middle of the street before and felt the world turning around me. I've come to know the truth that I'm small in this world, but I'm alive. That counts for something, right? The days and the nights fight for my attention, for my soul. But as every hour and every minute pass, I know that I am alone. _

_People say that no one really likes being alone; I'm one of those people. But there is something to being alone. It's tough. There's something raw about being alone. _

I've been lying in bed for the past hour trying to feel something. Trying to feel some ounce of life in me. But you cannot force an emotion. Just like you can't force being in love.

I wander a lot. Times when I can't feel anything, I wander. Personally, I think it comes from not having any friends, or in fact, not having anyone at all really.

There was a time that a part of me ached to be a part of a group, to be liked by people. I wanted that feeling of being so close to someone that I'd kill for them. It just never happened. I use to be good friends with Santana Lopez and Brittany Pierce. They were actually pretty okay. We did a lot together; we were the Unholy Trinity. But then life happened. We became distant. It happens to everyone at some point. My name is Quinn Fabray and I may not have any friends, but I had myself and that was enough. For now anyways.

Sometimes when I go wandering at night, I'll stop outside of Santana's house. Not to be creepy or anything, it's just when I was friends with her, I didn't feel so alone in this world. Her house had memories that weren't so bad, but it always makes my heart ache for something more.

I know the fallout was my fault. I had gone through this punk stage in my life. I'll admit, it was not one of my finest hours. But I was just so angry and I didn't care about anything. I was desperate to feel something. That seems to be a theme in my life. Feeling. People take it for granted. Even the sad people. The struggle in life for me was not being heartbroken, but rather just the act of emotions at all. I had this fear that my heart did not have the capacity to feel things that there was a screw loose in my head… that I had been wired wrong. Or even worse, I thought that maybe I was just one huge mistake and I wasn't supposed to be here at all.

In recent times, since S started talking to me again, we've picked up our rhythm. It's not the same of course. The beat is different and the melody sounds less familiar. But it's getting there. We're getting there.

She never asks how I am anymore, and I never ask for anything, at all really.

Anyways, that Friday night, I'm walking with my hands tucked in my pocket. I'm passing Santana's house, when I see her.

Rachel fucking Berry strolling on out of Santana's house like it's the most normal thing in the world. She looks happy. It was a vision of looking inside a mirror and wanting, needing everything. Because everything I saw was everything I was missing.


	5. Chapter 5

Hey readers, sorry that this story is so choppy and the chapters are so short. But my idea around this concept was a journal. In my personal life, my journal jumps from here to there, never really making sense. So with that in mind, I hope you stick with me. It's my first fanfic and I'm enjoying writing it.

Thanks for taking a chance with me :)

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><p><strong>Chapter 5<strong>

For a moment, as I was watching Rachel leaving Santana's house, I imagined myself holding her hand. Walking out of the house like it was a double date, that we were okay. But I did nothing, absolutely nothing. Even as I thought, _Hey Rach, you're really beautiful under the moon right now. _I let my shoulders slump over and started walking away; in that moment, I pitied myself.

"Quinn? Is that you?" Her voice echoed softly around us. She really did look beautiful.

I turn, "uhm, yeah. Hi Rachel."

"Are you okay? Do you need a ride home?" She looked worried, her brow knitted together. It was all too much. She was too much.

"I'm fine, thanks though"

The phone rang.

Rachel: " Hello, this is Rachel Berry. How may I help you?"

She was ridiculous. But I couldn't help the slow smile spread across my face.

The other end: "where are you?"

Rachel: " patience is a virtue you need to learn."

It was Finn.

I knew it. Even though I was a good distance away from the phone, I could tell it was Finn. He talks loudly on the phone.

"Have you left your house yet?"

Her house? I know I looked confused because Rachel glanced my way, hey eyes pleading with me.

"Yeah, I'll see you in ten. "

"Right, okay bye. Love you."

"Bye."

Secretly, I hated knowing that she was going to Finns. I enjoyed these quiet intense moments with her. She reminded me that I was alive.

" So uhm, I'll see you around Quinn. Unless you need a ride…" She looked uncomfortable.

I shake my head, "I'll be seeing you" and I turned and walked away.

When I arrived at home, I couldn't stop the chaos in my head. Maybe the best way to describe me that night was harmoniously crazy.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Gay. Gay. Gay.

These are the words that echo in my mind. I hated it. This was the part of me I hated most. Not because I find it disgusting, but because I knew that my family would find it disgusting. I had, at this point, made my parents reject me. Even my sister, Frannie left me. So the idea of making them yet again have a reason to hate me, well I just wasn't so keen on the idea.

But it's true what they say. You can't help who you love. The heart wants what the heart wants.

Soon you'll know why I've mentioned this fact about me…

On Friday that week, I decided I should come out. A secret is always dangerous, especially when you have no one to hold you after the aftermath of its release. You just have to pray that it won't end in a tragedy. You hope beyond hope that the judgmental stares won't hurt you. But it's a risk you have to take.

"Every one quiet down, Quinn has an announcement to make" Mr. Schue said as glee club members were taking their seats.

I'm looking at the faces before me. And trying to remind myself that there are some good people in this room. Of all the people to tell in this school, this was the group of people to tell.

I take a deep breath, " I'm gay." Typically I would survey the room and gauge people's reactions after I say something of this caliber, but I just didn't have the courage.

"That's it?" a familiar voice calls out.

I glance up, Santana.

"Girl, I could've told you that last year. "

I can't help but laugh, " well you should have, I could've used the heads up"

We exchanged a look of mutual friendliness and I felt much more at ease.

You're probably thinking, well that wasn't much of a coming out story. That seemed pretty simple. For me, it wasn't the coming out that was the damaging part. It was what came afterward.


	7. Chapter 7

Dear reader who wrote a review... Thank you so much! I will do just that. I think I was just in a rush to get chapters up, but you're right. Longer chapters, less frequent uploads. However, I had already finished this part... so I figured I'll upload the last short chapter.

I don't know why the spacing is so weird... sorry I'm technologically challenged.

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><p><strong>Chapter 7<strong>

_Tonight, I sit on the ground. The wind crawls up my skin and I taste the metallic of the blood as I lick my lips. _

_The world is cold and dark. _

_This life is filled with numbness and the sky is closing around me. _

_I see the flash of faces and I'm on the verge of tears. _

_I've fallen, my knees have buckled, and my feet are tired. _

_I'm tired. _

_But my eyes are hungry. They burn with desire. I yearn for the strength to keep fighting through the night. _

It's been a week. A week since I've outed myself.

You have to wonder how rumors spread so fast, it's like a wildfire and the students are the trees that can't escape the flame.

Walking down the halls of McKinley, you'd think I was a celebrity or something.

I couldn't help but notice.

I was being watched.

This particular day had been, to put it mildly, rough. I found a note waiting for me in the kitchen this morning. "_Dear Quinn, your father and I are going to Hawaii. We will be returning next week. We left money for you in the drawer next to the stove. " _Generally, I would be ecstatic that they were gone. But they went to Hawaii. Frannie lives in Hawaii. Have you ever stood in your kitchen and felt like falling to your knees?

So with that in mind, I snapped, "take a picture, it lasts longer".

Nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

They kept right on staring, but not one said a word.

I was visibly invisible.

So as I walked home, I thought nothing of the stupid football jocks lumbering towards me. They weren't the "nice" jocks either. They were distasteful and crude. Yet, my mind hadn't caught up to what was happening.

Next thing I know, I'm on the ground.

Clothing optional.

Once it got darker, I decided I'd better get help.

I got up.

My bones ached and my body screamed at the shooting pain.

I wrapped my arms around myself, tighter.

I got lost in my thoughts. Recalling what they had said, " you're not gay… you just haven't had a real man. C'mon Fabray… I promise. You're in for a treat"

You get pushed around a lot in life. But this time it hurt.


	8. Chapter 8

Hey readers... so this chapter is definitely not my finest writing. But quite honestly, I needed to move on from it so I just decided to upload it. There is a good chance that I'll just scrap the whole thing so be on the look out for a completely new chapter 8. I realize that this is still a pretty short chapter but I'm trying to slowly move into making chapters longer.

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><p><strong>Chapter 8<strong>

As I walked, then began to run, I realized that I didn't have any horrible thoughts toward the three boys. I knew I should have, but I didn't. Instead, I'd only held hatred in my heart toward myself.

I was met with headlights once I made it to the main street. I stopped running. My breath caught when I saw Rachel Berry come tumbling out of the car.

Her eyes bulged out, it was actually quite unsettling, " Quinn! Oh my gosh, what happened? You're bleeding! I'm taking you to the hospital."

I sighed, trying to act nonchalant about the whole thing. But she saw through me. She always did. " Berry, I'm fine. Can you give me a lift home?"

She looked at me. With this big brown eyes and stared straight in my soul. I felt myself cower a little. " I will take you home. " I must've looked unconvinced, because she repeated herself. " Quinn, I will take you home, but not before we go to the hospital or even the police."

I couldn't help the groan that escaped my lips, " Rachel, I just really want to shower and sleep. I swear I'm fine. Just take me home" I sounded whiney, I knew it. It wasn't the Quinn Fabray she was used to.

"I realize that I am being slightly insensitive at the moment, but I'm not discussing this any further Quinn. Either you let me drive you to the hospital or we stand here all night. I'm not leaving you either way, so make your decision. " _Not leaving. _How sweet two words could sound.

She was so infuriating. I mean, I know she means well. But damn it to all hell, I just wanted to shower and wipe the remnants of past few hours off my skin. " Fine." I walked to the passenger seat and got in the car, she followed suit getting into the drivers seat, "drive Berry".

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><p>There was more silence in the hospital room than anything else. I don't know about you, but I find silence to be chilling. I kept a brave front, even when the police showed up. It was the memory of the stares that spoke loudest through my mind. They didn't look at me with sadness; they looked at me like I was broken. Like my life had been ripped apart because of these boys, they stared as if I was a lost cause.<p>

"Miss Fabray, my name is Bailey and I'll be helping you out tonight. Is there anyone you'd like to call, anyone you'd want with you?"

Rachel. " uhm, the-the girl I came with. Can she be with me?"

"Yes, of course. I'll go get her. Before I go, can you tell me what happened?"

"I-I can't." Keep it together Fabray. "I need her here first."

"Okay, I'll be right back." She gave a reassuring smile and squeezed my hand.

She walked in without hesitation; she took my hand. For a split second, I felt safe. But her eyes. Oh god, how sad her eyes were. She knew. "Hi… are you doing okay?"

"Better now" and I meant it with my whole heart.

I remember relaying the story to the police officers. I remember Rachel's hand tighten around mine and her eyes shut when the officers asked for more detail. The rest of the hospital was a blur.

Somehow I ended up at home. She had been looking warily at me. "I'm okay Rach, I promise" I reassured her.

She stifled a cry, " No you're not Quinn. But you will be. If it's the last thing I do, I'll make you okay.

I should be reeling. I should be angry. No one tells Quinn Fabray that she is not okay. No one. But instead, I can't stop the tears from brimming over and I collapse. I feel her arms catch me and wrap tightly around my body.

I feel her shift around me, and I realize she's picking me up. Who knew such a small person could carry so much weight. I curl into her. We're in my bathroom. She lifts my shirt over my head and slips my shoes off my feet. She turns to start the shower. As she's leaving, I grab her arm, "Rachel… don't leave."

She hesitates and gives me a sad smile. I take her hand and I pull her into the shower with me. I feel her arms wrap around me and I can't stop the shiver that runs through my body.

I don't realize she's singing to me until my breathing settles.

_Drink up with me now and forget all about the pressure of days_

_Do what I say and I'll make you okay._

_And drive them away, the images stuck in your head._

I can feel myself falling.

_People you've been before that you don't want around anymore_

_That push and shove and won't bend to your will_

_I'll keep them still_

I closed my eyes and got lost in her voice, the words, and the feeling of her arms around me.

_Drink up one more time and I'll make you mine_

_Keep you apart, deep in my heart. Separate from the rest._

_Where I like you the best and keep the things you forget._

There was nothing sexual about this position. She was fully clothed; she washed my hair, and washed the memories of the night off my skin. In that moment, I forgot why she was here. I only felt her, saw her, loved her.

"Can you stay the night?"

"Of course, I'll call my Dad's." She saw the sudden fear in my eyes, "Don't worry, I won't tell them why, I'll be right back."

I smiled and started getting ready for bed.

Her arms enclose around me in bed, " Rachel… can y- you sing to me again?"

I can feel her smile against my neck. Going in and out of sleep, the only words that echoed in my dreams were:

_I will never let you fall; I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all, even if saving you sends me to heaven._

_It's okay. It's okay. It's okay._

She broke into me. Her voice reached into me and grabbed me by the heart. It was the words, and the voice, and Rachel and me. I could only listen as she slowly collected the broken parts of me and placed them gently back together.

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><p>Music:<p>

**Behind the Bars: Elliot Smith**

**Your Guardian Angel: The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus **


	9. Chapter 9

Hey readers! I literally do not know how to fix the spacing. In _word_, it looks fine but then I upload it...

Anyway, thanks for reading. I promise, we're getting to the romance. I'm a sucker for the build up. :P

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><p><strong>Chapter 9<strong>

_Sometimes in life you go to the wrong place, but the right way always comes and finds you. It might make you trip over it or it might come to you when a day is stripped apart by night. It'll ask you to take its hand and leave this wrong place. _

_There are moments when you can only stare, watching the world forget you as you try to remove yourself from it. Life will come, calling your name; begging. But you're gone. You hear nothing, see nothing. You've gone, and it's a place where nothing can touch you. Nothing can save you. _

_Then you're back on earth, placed where the world doesn't recognize you. Your name is the same as it always was; you look and sound the same._

_Yet. You are not the same. _

_The world will call out to you again. This time. This time it connects. It speaks to you rather than at you. Sometimes you feel it calling out for you. _

She had spent the entire weekend with me. After the initial shock of the situation, we talked. Just not about what happened.

"So you dumped him?"

She shrugged " Finn and I had a discussion about our relationship. After everything that had happened between us, we realized that we were just forcing something that was inevitably going to end. We had a mutual break up."

"When?"

Chuckling, her hand moves to scratch the back of her neck revealing a tattoo that had gone unnoticed, " actually the night we saw each other at Santana's house".

I was staring. "What? Is there something on my face?"

I closed the distance; pulled her hair back, and my finger outlined the small tattoo hidden behind her ear. "What is this?"

"Oh… uhm, it's a tattoo".

I rolled my eyes at her, "I know it's a tattoo Rachel".

She laughed nervously, "right. I got it last year. It's Hebrew for forgiveness. I- uh I just needed a reminder".

Sometimes I can't stop the eyebrow raise. It just happens. " But you can't see it."

"I don't need to see it. When you permanently mark yourself you tend to never forget".

Questions lunged at me. There was a sadness that flickered in her eyes. Did she want me to change the subject?

In the end it was Rachel's voice that drove the silence away.

"I…" She hesitated. I waited.

She sighed, "Sophomore and Junior year, I suffered from self harm. I- uh, I have scars so that's what I mean. The scars burn more than the actual act. I don't have the ability to forget… I mean I see them everyday when I look in the mirror. But I can forgive". She glanced at me then quickly looked away.

I stared at her. I watched her. The sadness settled into her eyes. It made my heart ache.

A minute passed, and another. It was like nails on a chalkboard silence. I couldn't stop all chaos in my head.

Finally, I moved.

"Rach-" my voice caught.

She leaned into me. It was my turn to hold her.

I couldn't stop the memory from coming back into my mind.

_Freshman year. Rachel walked through the hallway of McKinley High._

_They called her name incessantly or rather callous names. They labeled her without a second look. _

"_Hey man hands", "yo dwarf", "get lost boy hips". _

_Each time Rachel kept walking. _

_It made me envy her, as she kept her smile on her face. _

_Rachel was at her locker, stopping her momentum. _

_They pointed. Laughed. Told her she was useless. _

_As she moved to put her books in her locker, a large red slushy made contact with her head. _

_She stopped. _

_She just froze. _

_In no rush at all, she continued to put her books into her locker. Then she picked up the cup and held it in her hand. She studied it. _

_She turned to the group, where it came from. They became quiet. She carefully handed the cup back to them. Then she started walking again. She stopped. Turned. She stared at them for a few seconds, and then continued walking. _

_As I watched this all happening, I couldn't help notice that Rachel's stare wasn't angry in any way. If anything, it was amused. She could have done anything she wanted, said anything. She could have slapped them or thrown the cup at them. _

_But that was something _they _could have done just as easily. _

_There was no way they could have walked away if it were them. _

_That was how she beat them. _

_That was how she won. _

_She did the one thing they were incapable of doing. _

_She walked away. _

I couldn't help but wonder what happened to that girl, to that Rachel. But I knew exactly what happened and it killed me a little inside.


	10. Chapter 10

Thanks for sticking with me... I swear, I'm getting to the wooing.

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><p><strong>Chapter 10 <strong>

I stared long and hard at the mirror that Monday. There was something different about me. I was wearing the sort of thing I always wear nowadays. Cute dress with a basic cardigan, and flats. I tried to fix my unruly hair, but my hair just normally looks slightly messy ever since I chopped half of it off. I like to think I rock the beach look, but who knows.

I was nervous. Nervous as hell. I couldn't stop thinking about all the things that might go wrong. Not being able to control my emotions. Seeing them. I covered all of the possibilities in my mind.

"You're Quinn Fabray. You can do this." I told myself.

It was settled. I was going.

I let the front door slam shut behind me. It was as if the door was kicking me out of the cocoon I had made with Rachel, throwing me out into the world. I got into the passenger seat of Rachel's car and gave her a quick smile. I looked back at my house as she pulled out of the driveway. It wasn't the same anymore. It never would be.

I barely paid attention to the drive. It was only when Rachel slammed on the breaks did I realize how nervous she was. "Shit, sorry Quinn…" her hands were shaking. I looked at her, "it's okay, no worries Rach". I couldn't afford being distracted. Not today. I needed to focus. I could tell that today was different. There was a different feel that filled the atmosphere.

We reached the school. I got out of the car. Standing there, I waited until I felt the cold reach my bones. Then looking over at Rachel, we walked in. Together.

We walked through the halls of McKinley High.

People stared. We kept walking.

Finally, reaching my locker, I turned away from the curious eyes of my peers. " I'll see you in class, yeah?"

Rachel smiled, "of course, I'll see you there" and skipped off. I shook my head and smiled to myself.

I went back to grabbing textbooks for my next few classes. I barely heard the footsteps coming toward me, but there was no way of missing the presence of Sue Sylvester. She placed her hand on my shoulder.

"We need to talk. My office".

I shiver even now as I remember the feeling of her words. It wasn't that she scared me. But rather, her voice was laced with concern. And that terrified me.

There was no holding back anymore. In my mind, I had gone over how to keep it together. I had at that point made it a goal to never cry in front of others, especially Coach Sylvester. There was only one way for me to blow it.

My mouth went dry as she sat across from me. I opened my mouth to say something, but nothing came out.

"Quinn… as you know, I have my own news segment. There's a story airing in a few days."

My face dropped. Already. Fuck.

"It's okay Quinn. I made them postpone it. I know we may not have left off amicably, but I do care about you. I know it might not seem so, but you have always been one of my favorites. I just wanted you to know that I am here for you and I will see to it that those… those savages get punished".

She smiled sadly at me, telling me silently that it was okay not to talk. It was okay not to explain.

"Quinn, I'd like to help you. Anything you need, don't hesitate to ask".

I don't even know why. But those words broke me. I tried so hard to stop the tears, to stop my shoulders from shuddering. I heard myself crying. It was horrible. It made me angry. But I felt her put her hand on my shoulder and felt myself let the walls come crumbling down.

We stayed like that for a long time. I cried and she made her presence known. Once I recovered, Her voice broke through the room "so, not to ruin this touching moment, But… the Cheerios. Want to come back?" She looked completely serious.

I couldn't help but laugh. She handed me my uniform and shrugged " Take it. Think about it. Don't decide now. Now shoo, you've already missed first period".

I smiled, collected myself, and walked out feeling, capable. Capable of being okay, of happiness.

Rachel knew.

She had heard through the grapevine that Sue had pulled me into her office. She looked worried. When she saw me walk into class, she waved me over to sit next to her.

It was funny. Three days ago, I wouldn't be caught dead talking to her. Now, I couldn't wait to hear her voice, feel her touch.

She leaned over and whispered, "tell me. What happened?"

I smiled, "I'll tell you later. It was good though. Don't worry"

"Huh" she replied with a laugh. That was all she said. She turned away to pay attention to the teacher, smiling.

The end of the day rolled around. Walking into Glee club, I took a seat next to Rachel. She turned towards me, " Okay" she huffed, "you've kept me waiting long enough, spill Fabray".

"She offered me my spot back on the squad". I smiled and raised my eyebrow, waiting for her to question me.

"Oh." She looked a little shocked, "that's great!"

"And she told me that she's going to go all Sue Sylvester on their asses"

Her eyes widened "she said that!?" I laughed. "Well that's fantastic. I always knew she was a good person. She probably doesn't even hate Glee club. She has a deep fondness for our eloquent voices. We should sing her a song, don't you think? What song should w-"

I interrupted her, "Rach, calm down". She blushed. "I can almost guarantee that if we sang her a song, she would kick us out of Lima, Ohio for eternity".

She giggled. It was like music to my ears. Then Mr. Shue had to start talking.

"Okay people settle down. The lesson for the week is… " I stopped listening.

I let my mind drift. I let my eyes wander towards Rachel. The light silhouetted her features perfectly, I watched intently as her eyes focused on Mr. Shue. I looked at her neck, her soft skin, and glanced down at her perfectly toned legs.

"Quinn… Quinn!" My head snapped upward towards the glee director. "Are you okay?"

I blushed, "fine, sorry. Please continue".

Before completely focusing on the lesson, I made a mental note. I would make Rachel Berry fall in love with me.

I told you there was something different about this day.


End file.
